Homesick Londoners on holiday or visiting anywhere outside the M25 corridor who may be missing the pollution of London need not panic any more. Transport For London has launched their latest product today aimed at keeping City dwellers topped up with lethal levels of vehicle toxins.
A spokesman for Transport For London told Civil Unrest:
“Our portable gas masks come packed with the latest CO2 and cancer causing chemicals, providing every customer with one weeks worth of life threatening pollution with every breathe inhaled”.
“Why should Londoners miss out on the smells of the capital whilst visiting the countryside, majestic coastlines or walking in the Alps. Our gas masks are easy to use, affordable and provides every customer with a chemical punch that is authentic and very pleasing to the lungs”.
“Our TFL gas masks are manufactured using the latest environmentally friendly silicone and plastics from Chinese sweatshops. They are also BSI (British Standards) approved to be used for air travel, hospital waiting rooms, local garden centres and environmental protests”.